How Deep is Deep

I've seen the mountains and I've seen the valleys. I tried to carry the highest peaks and dig out of the deepest trenches. When the mountain was high and the clouds blocked the view from the top I took for granted that which was before me. When the canyons were deep the damp cold air made it impossible to sojourn out, I stayed stuck blaming anything I could attach my terrible attitude too. Mountains were made to climb not carry and valleys were made to bridge not fall into. Yet carry I did and bridge I did not.

When the sun sets and your mind is clear your heart can race to the soul and discover a magical place of solace that escapes all points of desperation. Then you find that the lock to your emotional being has no key and you quickly realize that depression has left your spirit despondent with nothing but darkness to be your guide.

He tried hard to see that his life was a slick trajectory down, yet when those glimmers of dry dirt stopped the slide he reverted back to the addictions and habits that placed him in the hole in the first place. One slip in the mud and the fall starts all over again, each time getting closer to a bottom that has absolutely no hope for a future light. When you are going down all you see is down. Was it desperation or was it depression. All he knew was it wasn't his fault.

In his moments of despair when he would hit the slick spot, his irrational behavior offered little help in slowing the pace. In his desperation he would reach for any form of tentacle or obstacle that served as a life preserver. What he found however was that the walls in the valley were smooth which sped up his cascade down. He had rubbed off all the edges that had any potential for help. His behavior created an isolation that only he could take responsibility for. He was alone in a ditch that he dug.

As the light faded and depression crept in, his hopelessness and desire for life was waning. Looking back a few years his dream of owning a landscaping business and turning lawns into masterpieces was his reason for being. The stories and ideas he shared about how to transform grass and shrubs into works of art was mesmerizing. As he gained jobs his reputation for great work was abound. What happened next set into motion a series of events that begin his free fall. His ego got to big, he started cutting corners out of greed, and then he lost his biggest job due to poor performance. He publicly blamed everyone and before long his business was gone. Thank goodness he saved enough to drink and party for a few months. He used every one on the ascent which left him with no hope on the descent.

There is no way to pin down exactly how he fell from the mountain but one thing is for sure, it wasn't how steep the climb it was the weight of the carry. When he fell he rolled past the bottom into the ditch, caught up in the water, washed down stream and dropped face down into a valley so deep that death was a welcome sight. Finally he was realizing that all the energy he wasted blaming could and should have been used in other more productive ways. But it didn't matter now, life was over, he was drowning in the mud of his making.

We will never know what woke him up. All we know is when he splashed hard into the mud at the ruts deepest level, he sit up and noticed someone with him. She was angelic, it seemed, not pure as the driven snow, as some would say in story book land. She was simply sitting there with a glow that brought warmth to the broken man's soul. With no words left to speak on his end, she decided to talk. She explained how desperation and depression link hopelessness and despair. She went on to share with him that at this very moment he was being offered a lifeline not extended to many at these depths. It was up to him to wash away the mud, climb back to the surface, restore your self worth, get off the clearance rack of life, and slowly but surely realize that your dreams are worth living for and that you as a person has more value than can be imagined. As he wiped the wet dirt from his eyes an ember begin to ignite inside him. As stood ready to climb out, with a gentle gesture she urged him to sit back down.

The task ahead will be the most difficult journey of your life, she said. The road is filled with potholes and littered with debris. It will take all the resolve you have to keep your eyes focused on the light. Nothing will come easy but the reward will be great. Each time you think you can't go on, take a second to remember whence you came. On your climb up it is imperative to leave ropes along the way. Your goal is to bring others up with you. Yes the weight will be almost unbearable at times but as you get stronger the load gets lighter. You will discover as others start climbing your value increases exponentially. You have become their hope, their lifeline, their light. As you push yourself up you are pulling them along. One slip and you all fall.

Three years after this encounter I had the great fortune of running into this amazing gentleman again. He stands by the angel in the valley story. What I admire most about my friend Jack is how many people he has helped along the way. Jack was at the lowest point a person could be at, he had zero hope, but somehow someway God was able to show him that even at worst place in life your value still has a worth you cannot see. He told me that his lawn business was thriving and he had 18 people on his team, all of whom he gave a second chance too.

When you think life is over, trust me, it may just be beginning. There are angels and ragpickers in every walk of life, we just have to wipe the mud from our face too see the light before us. It isn't God, it is people allowing God to love others through them. I'm glad I met Jack in that valley and even more happy that we shared a view from the top. He no longer digs ditches, he builds bridges, it takes the same amount of effort but the return on investment makes him know without a shadow of a doubt that LOVE for others is a powerful force unmatched by anything else on earth.
The mountains and valleys are a wonderful metaphor for life. As is the angelic lady in the pit and who knows she may have been a man.
God bless
Dale